Ice Cream and Cake

This commercial makes me feel like I imagine I'd feel if I were on acid.  Also, it reminds me of that Quizno's ad from several years ago with that nonsensical puppet and song: "They got a pepper bar!"  I think what I'm trying to say is that even though these sorts of ads make relatively little sense and were probably thought up because it sounded so stupid it just might work, it is in fact catchy as hell and all I can think about right now is ice cream and cake.  Yum. Also, maybe those people who thought up Peanut Butter Jelly Time should sue for copyright infringement.  Same idea, almost identical sound.

And, yes.  I am aware that this is basically the most pointless blog post ever.  But you know what? Even Radios have to take commercial breaks and air filler broadcasting sometimes.  Now, get me some ice cream.  And cake!

Solar Eclipse of the Heart

Maybe you're like me, and you visit astrologyzone.com at the top of every month, sort of half-assedly reading your horoscope for the coming thirty (or thirty-one days).  And so maybe you know that today there is a serious and total solar eclipse happening over on the other side of the world -- people across Asia from India to Japan will be witness to the sun disappearing for a full six minutes.  For almost as long as eclipses have been happening, there has been a superstitious element to many people's opinions of them: certain cultures believe that babies born under a solar eclipse will have a cleft palate, for example.  While I am not so silly as to believe everything that my horoscope ever tells me or to take as serious these ideas that mass violence and natural disasters will occur as a result of an eclipse, this year I cannot help but to believe that something is, in fact, happening and it is fucking all sorts of shit up.

Earlier this month, when I read my horoscope, I--given my current situation--suspected trouble might be afoot when I read the following:

"Now let's turn to the solar eclipse, July 21, which will actually be quite wonderful. As a Leo, you are ruled by the Sun, so you always feel solar eclipses more personally than lunar eclipses. (The July 7 eclipse will be lunar). I love solar eclipses - they are usually harbingers of very good news and open up a whole long road of opportunity that lasts for months, and possibly years!

I should mention that if you were born July 22-26 you might see a prominent man leave your immediate environment in the days, weeks, or months to come. That may be your husband, father, or male boss, as three examples. This person may move away or in the case of a boss, change jobs. A solar "eclipse" usually "eclipses out" a male figure, but only if you were born very near that eclipse."

And, without going into details, this has, in fact, happened.  But not just to me--to at least two other people in my life--and I find that sort of coincidence utterly fascinating.  There have been many a tear shed over the past week or so and at this point, my only advice to both myself and those that I feel this might have affected is that these events will, hopefully, open up a "whole long road of opportunity."  Make shit happen for yourself, people!  This solar eclipse, and also the new moon, are giving you the chance to start a new chapter, to change any sort of course in your life that has maybe not been going as well as you'd like. 

For me, I'm turning twenty-five in a fews days, an age that has always signified real adulthood to me, and I'm going to look at both this landmark birthday and the events surrounding the total eclipse as a chance to clean up my life, get rid of all the toxic or unhealthy aspects of it and focus on myself as opposed to others for a while.  I'm looking forward to it and, even if you think astrology is hokey and bullshit, maybe it's not a bad idea for you, too, to do some summer life cleaning.  We all, after all, have some sort of bad habit that we are always resistant to break.  Now's the time, people--the stars are in your favor.

Speaking of Stars, I cannot stop listening to this song on repeat (a little emo, I know, given all that I've just waxed philosophical on, still it's a staple of my music library and has been for years):

Your Ex-Lover Is Dead (Album Version) - Stars

What Do Megan Fox and I Have in Common?

I'm wearing a very similar outfit and, in general, have wanted to express this same gesture to most every single person I've had to interact with today.  Happy Tuesday, y'all! 

 

The Dirty Crush

We all have them, those celebrity crushes that are completely inexplicable.  Like, never in your real life would you be at all attracted to someone who looked like said celebrity, but for some reason -- either because you saw them perform live at the Roseland Ballroom once and the way they played the shit out of a guitar made you a little weak in the knees, or any of a number of other reasons -- you just can't help but be completely enamored by almost anything they do.  I have friends who admit to having these "dirty crushes" on people like Kid Rock or Colin Farrell (okay, yes, he's sort of traditionally attractive, but he also seems to be a walking STD machine). Mine, ever since the summer of 2006, has been Jack White, and his new supergroup project with fellow Raconteur Jack Lawrence as well as The Kills' Alison Mosshart and Dean Fertita of QOTSA (no Josh Homme, saldy, but I guess there's only room for one sexy vocalist in this group) and the following resulting video further cements my belief that the man can do almost no wrong.  I say almost because he did, after all, date Renee Zellweger, something that seemed too bizarre even for him.  Anyway, I'm looking forward to this Dead Weather album, which will be releasing tomorrow and, who knows, maybe I'll even head down to the open-for-two-days-only Third Man Records store on Chrystie to buy my copy later this week.

The Dead Weather - Treat Me Like Your Mother